The Beginner’s Guide to Sex and Contraception

I think we should start by addressing the real problem here, which is a group of afflicted individuals who inhale the earth’s oxygen with us. They look like us. They walk among us.

The people who type the word ‘sex’ as ‘s*x’.

If you are one of them and you are reading this, what exactly is the problem? Please share with the group so we can pray fervently for you.

There was an incident recently in my school, involving some students rumored to have gotten pregnant. Of course people found it sensational and had the time of their lives bantering about it, but the news made me unhappy largely because I knew there were different means the situation could have been avoided.

Introducing: contraception.

It is the deliberate use of artificial methods to prevent pregnancy. What an amazing concept. A variety of contraceptive options exist around us, they are cheap and easily accessible. Sexually active or not, you should be aware.

Male Condoms

This is the most popular option so there isn’t much to say. If this is your choice, please make sure that it is actually used correctly to avoid missed periods and tales of ‘I thy know’. They’re really effective, as they also prevent you from getting STIs, so yay!

Combined Oral Contraceptive Pills

These are pills that contain hormones; they work by preventing ovulation, and doing some other things I’m sure they taught us in class. They’re taken daily, it’s what women in movies refer to when they say “I’m on the pill”.

They’re highly effective, but they don’t prevent the transmission of STIs. A sweet benefit is that they relieve the pain of menstrual cramps, so it’s quite appealing.

Emergency Contraceptive Pills

Also known as the morning-after pill, but ’emergency contraceptive pill’ is a more elite term.

As the name suggests, it’s to be used when a person has had unprotected or unexpected sex. It can be gotten at any standard pharmacy and you don’t need a doctor’s prescription.  It’s taken twice 12 hours apart within 3 days of intercourse.

Beloved, Postinor 2 is an emergency contraceptive and ideally should not be used more than once in a month but I know you people will not listen.

Implants

This is my favorite as it’s a form of long term contraception. They are capsules, the size of a matchstick, and are inserted into the fat just below the skin where they remain, doing the Lord’s work.

They’re replaced every 3 to 5 years, depending on your choice of implant.

Injectables

If you love being stuck with a needle every now and then, this is for you. These are hormones that work like the pills, but are in injection preparations. They are taken every 2 or 3 months.

There are a bunch of other options but I’ll leave it at these.

Where to get them?

 You can go to any standard health facility and ask for their Family Planning Clinic. There, you can get any of these for a small price and hopefully without any drama. Everyone at the Family Planning Clinic, UCH Ibadan, conducts the business professionally so I can recommend.

I have heard about some unfortunate centers, where in the usual Nigerian hypocritical fashion, they may start to give you some judgemental vibes that you must dispel immediately. Please if anyone looks at you funny, look at them funny as well.

Insist on what you are there for, as it is their job to provide these services to you, and answer your questions.

That’s it for today’s class. For a mind that knows is a mind that’s free innit?

Thanks for reading and feel free to ask any questions through the comment section below. Ciao!

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